Celebrity Gossip, Bikinis and T-Shirts with a Twisted Sense of Humor

Sienna Miller Gets Naked, Sues Paparazzi

An Australian paparazzi and his London-based photographic agency are being sued by actress Sienna Miller. She claims that they did its intolerable life after to lead a "the country of annoyance" against her. In the other news, the apparent images of Miller nude in fires for the film of Hippie Hippie Shake wherever can be found on the Internet.

Labels: Sienna Miller

Awesome Christmas Decoration!

Christmas is coming quicker than you think! Check out this collectible Disney Tabletop Christmas Tree, it is beautiful!

The Wonderful World Of Disney Christmas Tree: Collectible Disney Tabletop Christmas Decor

Nicole Richie Whores Her Tiny Jewelry

Nicole Richie has been whoring her new line of jewelry, House of Hell Harlow. Amazingly enough, her bracelets and rings will only fit on women under the age of 7.

Labels: Nicole Richie

Denise Richards to Return to E!

Variety is reporting that Denise Richards: It's Complicated will be returning to E!. There must be just a ton of exciting new shows available for E!.

Labels: Denise Richards

Melrose Place Set to Return from the Dead. Like a Stinking, Rotten Corpse

The network of mediocrity, CW Network, is considering a remake of the show Melrose Place. Much like the remake of 90210, another show for woman with more time than sense, the CW wants to create this thing. Please keep Heather Locklear away from the automobiles so that she can participate. We need to see her in the sweater of tights.

Labels: Melrose Place

Danity Kane Down to Two Ho's

Aubrey O'Day, D. Woods and now Shannon Bex have either been booted from or have left Danity Kane. In other news, a tree fell in the forest.

Labels: Another Girl Band, Danity Kane

Donnie and Marie Extend Stay in Las Vegas, World Rejoices

Donnie and Marie Osmond have extended their Las Vegas variety show at the Flamingo for two more years through October 10th. There is no truth to the rumor that Marie's dolls have been buying up all the tickets.

Labels: Donnie and Marie Osmond

Kirsten Dunst and Justin Long Are NOT Seeing Each Other. Sort of.

Kirsten Dunst continues to deny she is seeing the Mac Slob, Justin Long, again. She continues to deny this while trying extra hard to be spotted with him out in public. She needs to hang his butt upside down by a Mac mouse cable and kiss him with the hard nipples.

Labels: Justin Long, Kirsten Dunst, Lovey Dovey

Heather Mills Blows Through Divorce Money

Heather Mills has reportedly already spent half of her $50 million divorce settlement from Beatleman Paul McCartney. She is also asking Paul for another home, reportedly around $5 million dollars. What a special woman she is!

Labels: Gold Digger, Heather Mills

Anne Hathaway on Broadway?!

Broadway World has been reporting that a secret, closed door reading with Anne Hathaway took place this weekend for the musical Promises, Promises. This is a musical comedy based on the film The Apartment by Billy Wilder.

We will be dwelling through the wall grinder!

Labels: Anne Hathaway; Broadway

Toni Braxton Eliminated from Dancing With the Stars

Toni Braxton and her professional partner, Alec Mazowas, were eliminated from Dancing with the Stars Tuesday night. That it is good on the thorax it is not always like good on the track from dance.

Celebrities remaining in the competition include TV personality Brooke Burke; singer Lance Bass; former NFL star Warren Sapp; Olympic gold medalist Maurice Greene; actor Cody Linley; and actresses Cloris Leachman and Susan Lucci. Chef Rocco DiSpirito, reality TV star Kim Kardashian, actor Ted McGinley and comedian Jeffrey Ross were previously eliminated.

Labels: Dancing with the Stars, Toni Braxton

Jessica Simpson Launches New Stink Juice

Jessica Simpson launched her new perfume thing, Fancy, on Saturday. It has been described as a sweet fragrance with ingredients like "pear, apricot nectar, toasted almonds and caramel." And semen.

Labels: Jessica Simpson

Ivanka Trump Whores Microwave Meals

Why it has not enough money, the Ivanka Trump is the schilling for Healthy Choice Fresh Mixers. This is the food that can sit in its writing desk for a year until she wants to eat it. Yum.

Labels: Ivanka Trump;Whoring for Dollars

eDiets Meal Delivery Plan

eDiets.com's meal delivery service, Deliciously Yours, was acknowledged by the premier award-winning food website, Epicurious.com, as the best meal delivery service. Judged on flavor, nutrition, portion size, convenience, variety, and customer service & support tools, Deliciously Yours earned 3 out of 4 stars and blew the competition away! eDiets offers customizable popular diet and fitness plans that feature innovative motivational and support tools.

Jonas Brother New Video, Love Bug

Check out the official version of the Jonas Brothers new video, Love Bug.

Labels: Jonas Brothers

Faith Hill Can Now Bend in Ways to Make Man Happy

41-year old Faith Hill crooner of off key hillbilly music shows off her new bikini body on the cover of December's Shape Magazine. She brags about her ability to now bend in ways of the basket trick.

Labels: Faith Hill

Rose McGowan And Robert Rodriguez Back Together

Rose McGowan let everyone know that she and Robert Rodriguez will be getting married sometime in 2009. The actress with okay bossom has appeared in director Rodriquez's Grind House, one of the few films he has made that wasn't mediocre for children lately.

Labels: Lovey Dovey, Robert Rodriguez, Rose McGowan

Sarah Palin Destorys McCain's Campaign, Has Fun on SNL

McCain has just destoyed his campaign with the selection of Sarah Palin as his running mate. But she did get to have a great time on Saturday Night Live this weekend! Yay!

Labels: Sarah Palin, SNL

Lauren Conrad Denies She is Dating Kyle Howard, But Still Sluts All Over Him

Lauren Conrad continues to deny she is attached to My Boys actor Kyle Howard. The two have been spotted at a couple of L.A. hotspots, sorta drapped all over each other.

Labels: Kyle Howard, Lauren Conrad, My Boys, The Hills

Billy Bob Denies Affair with Tea Leoni

Billy Bob the Thorton denies messing around with Téa Leoni. Yawn.

Labels: Billy Bob Thorton, David Duchovny, Splitsville, Téa Leoni

Aniston Celebrates Mayer's Birthday with Cigars. Wink Wink!

Jennifer Anitson helped celebrate John Mayer's 31'st birthday on Wednesday at L.A.'s Grand Havana Room. How long do you think this couple will last this time?

Labels: Jennifer Aniston, John Mayer, Lovey Dovey

Free MP3 Ringtone for BikiniMelt Readers

Pick yourself up a free ringtone at Jamster. They've got a ton of great real music ringtones from the original artists. You don't have to purchase anything. Such a great offer for our guests!!

Téa Leoni Imitates David Duchovny and Sleeps Around?

Has one-time actress Téa Leoni been giving husband David Duchovny a taste of his own medicine? Duchovny has recently been receiving treatment for his sex addiction and now the couple is splitting, reportedly because Téa has been extra friendly with Billy Bob Thorton. Yikes!

Labels: David Duchovny, Splitsville, Téa Leoni

Sarah Palin Will Appear on SNL This Weekend

Just as we were to be reporting last week, VP nominee and hockey monster Sarah Palin will be appearing on Saturday Night Live this coming weekend. No word yet on which character she will be playing. Let's hope to be seeing her on a Lawrence Welk skit.

Labels: Sarah Palin, SNL

Down in the Polls, McCain Chases Obama Around Trying to Lick Him

Down in the polls, John McCain's crack campaign team advises him to chase Barack Obama down and lick him.

Labels: Barack Obama, John McCain, Politics

New Star Crap Crew Picture, Fixed!

A first look at the new Star Trek movie crew. Please to be enjoying it and drink more hillbilly pee.

Labels: Star Trek

Madonna Ditches Guy Ritchie for a Rod

Madonna finally ditches her man-servant Guy Ritchie. She must have had the good rump shaker to keep him around so long through her bad accent and nutty string bracelet religion.

Labels: Guy Ritchie, Madonna, Splitsville

Leonardo DiCaprio, His Facial Hair & Bar Rafaeli Back Together Again?

Leonardo DiCaprio and his sorta girlfriend, Bar Rafaeli, have been spotted together in Cancun, Mexico. Rafaeli is an Israeli model that is best known for spending time with DiCaprio's minute facial hair.

Labels: Bar Rafaeli, Leonardo DiCaprio, Lovey Dovey

MLB Postseason Tickets Available

Visit StubHub! for tickets to Major League Baseball postseason games. This is shaping up for an epic year of Division Series and League Championship games!

Tony Romo Breaks Finger - Simpson's Fault?

Tony Romo will be sidelined for up to four weeks with a broken finger. He sustained the injury during Sunday's game with the wretched Cleveland Browns. Reports are that the injury was not from the game, but from Jessica Simpson and her father trying to force a wedding ring onto his finger.

Labels: Jessica Simpson, Lovey Dovey, NFL, Tony Romo

Scare the Kids with Sarah Palin Masks

Check out these Sarah Palin masks, great for Halloween! Costumekingdom has managed to secure a limited quantity of the hottest mask of the year. There is limited stock coming in - order is guaranteed to ship no later than October 15th. These will sell fast so get them before they are gone!

Labels: Sarah Palin

Jonas Brothers to Play Cowboy's Halftime Show

The ever-popular Jonas Brothers will play the halftime show annual turkey of bowl in Dallas. The brothers will headline the halftime show during the Cowboy and Seahawks Thanksgiving NFL game. Who it knows what could happen, Jessica Simpson was once a time a part-time performer to this game!

Labels: Jonas Brothers, NFL

Jennifer Aniston & John Mayer Together Again?

The National Enquirer reported that Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer was seen to kiss Monday in Los Angeles. They had flown just in from New York on a private airplane together. The Aniston and Mayer ended a 3 1/2 month of romance back in August.

Labels: Jennifer Aniston, John Mayer, Lovey Dovey

Joey Chestnut Wins Famous Famiglia World Pizza Eating Championship

Famed eater of lots of food, Joey Chestnut, won the first-ever Famous Famiglia World Pizza Eating Championship in New York's Times Square. The 24-year-old San Jose, California, resident, ate 45 slices of pizza in ten minutes. Good for you Joey, you are a hero to the children all over the world of food!

Labels: Food, Joey Chestnut

Happy Columbus Day, Fixed!

Happy Columbus Day! Please enjoy your holiday with this picture of bikini razor rash!

Lisa Marie Presley Gives Birth to Twins

40-year-old person Lisa Marie Presley became mother again. Its agent of public connections reports that Presley bore girls twins. Presley is the daughter of singer and the eater of butter, Elivs Presley.

Labels: Baby News, Lisa Marie Presley

David Spade, Such a Caring Soul

People Magazine reports that David Spade checked in on his ex-girlfriend Heather Locklear after her arrest. Spade said he texted her to see how she was doing. Nice work on putting out so much effort there, Spade. Hope you didn't go over your minutes.

Labels: David Spade, Heather Locklear

Salma Hayek Joins 30 Rock

Actress Salma Hayek of Babalicious has registered to play a recurring part on the series of success of the NBC, 30 Rock. She will play Elisa, the love interest of the Alec Baldwin's character. We cannot take enough of Salmon and its thorax! east!

Labels: 30 Rock, Salma Hayek

Brooke Hogan Turns Down Offer to Appear in Playboy

Brooke Hogan (who knows why is well-known) refused a recent offer to appear in the Playboy. All we can say is thanks to this weird person.

Labels: Brooke Hogan

Awesome Halloween Costume Ideas

Check out all the videos of costumes available at BuyCostumes.com. It is a great way of getting a really good idea of what one will look like. Also check out the John McCain and Barack Obama masks.

Aubrey O'Day Kicked out of Danity Kane

The Diddy or whatever it is called this week, kicked Aubrey O'Day out of Danity Kane on Tuesday night's season finale of Making the Band. I yawn.

Joe Jonas Breaks Up with Taylor Swift

The Brother of Jonas Joe has finished things with country star hog caller Taylor Swift. We think that they will both make it just fine finding another average famous meat of the fame.

Labels: Taylor Swift

Tina Fey to Play Palin Again on SNL. And Again. And Again.

Tina Fey will be back to play Republican VP candidate Sarah Palin on 'Saturday Night Live' again. SNL is excited to have a skit for the first time in years that people are talking about. They are still trying to figure out how to fill the remaining 1:25 minutes with something else that is funny.

Labels: SNL, Tina Fey

Sarah Palin Considering Appearing on SNL

Saturday Night Live in the evening is speaking with the people of Sarah Palin about an appearance on the show. The word is that she can be spoofing Tina Fey's not too funny American Express commercials. This perhaps will be amusing, but we desire that she lose those ugly eyeglasses.

Labels: Sarah Palin, SNL

Elisabeth Hasselbeck Swears She is Staying on The View

Elisabeth Hasselbeck says that she will remain in 'The View'. Why would she want to be surrounded by a branch to cackle chickens they are beyond any guessing. Eating bugs in an island had to be better than discussing with name of the past Whoopi Goldberg.

Labels: Elisabeth Hasselbeck, The View

Salma Hayek Still has Breasts, Fixed!

Salma Hayek appeared on 'Wetten Das', a show of television German, over the weekend to promote her UNICEF campaign to end the tetanus. She put on a traditional dirndl that contained just its bosoms. The Salma and its bosoms govern!

Labels: Salma Hayek

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